Most of us are aware of how sexual attraction fades over time, but few do anything about it.

When you meet a hot guy with whom you want to become more intimate, passion bursts into flame. It seems like your bodies are on fire, melding together in sync. 

As time goes by, you swim deep into the waters of a relationship that slowly douses that fire.

Does either of you expect sex to be wild and spontaneous every time? If so, is that a realistic expectation? 

Is it realistic to assume you’ll both be equally horny at the same time? 

Yes, those moments of great mutual desire exist more in the early stages of a relationship. But over time, familiarity kicks in as your innate craving for novelty takes over. 

What’s the solution? 9 Reasons Planned Sex Brings Fire Into Relationships


1) Plan when you are going to have an honest sex talk

Those who think that talk is cheap don’t know how expensive silence can be. Speaking about sexual preferences should be a top relationship priority.

2) Sex full of passion and joy with can last many years

The intimacy and passion can last for years, even if you have a busy career or decide to have sex with other people via an open relationship.

All you need is a little bit of planning. A busy life may mean your sex life on schedule – and that’s ok! Knowing when something pleasurable is going to happen can be comforting for some people.

3) Planned sex does not mean you have to be on top (of your game) when it happens

Passionate sex can occur even If one of you is hornier than the other. Feel free to take a more passive role. The important thing is that you’re both bringing pleasure to each other.

4) Sex doesn’t have to be the most exciting every time

Save some fireworks for a rainy day, man.

5) Planning when you’re going to have sex does not mean planning what you will do with your partner

The more you distance yourself from a scenario, the bigger the chance you have sex full of pleasure and joy. Imperatives are not aperitifs.

6) Don’t obsess about the frequency. Forget about the quantity and focus on quality

Once you get rid of the social norms on how often you should have sex, the sooner you get rid of the sexual anxiety.

7) Active sexual desire is not a precondition of sexual arousal – motivation is

Crafting a schedule is like foreplay. The anticipation of coitus is like having sex with the future. Our ability to use our brains to evolve our sexual instincts voluntarily is more significant than we think.

8) Your relationship will have its ups and downs, no matter who is up and who is down

There will be phases when both of you are not sexually driven. Perhaps your both preoccupied with other things in your complicated life. Even If your sex life is stable, it’s not as bungee jumping as it was in the first couple of months. The idea of a fun long-term gay relationship is more of a commercial concept and a reality. Learn to plan.

9) Plan sexual activities that do not include penetration

To not penetrate might be a shocker to many, but passionate sex can happen without penetration. Drooling, cuddling, a spontaneous blow-job, mutual masturbation, nipple play, the list goes on. Sex doesn’t have to include orgasm. 

If you are both stimulated and satisfied, why not call it sex if you are doing yoga on the floor while your stud is reading a book in bed, smile and call it a sexual experience.

Have another TIP to ADD to this LIST?

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